I haven't had much chance to write lately thanks to vacation and now a project I have been contemplating. And true to the way my world works this week I have found myself tripping over what I can only think are reassurances.
Last week I was presented with a possibility. No, I'm not gonna tell what it is but I will say that I am totally excited by the prospect. I am also so anxious about it that my stomach is in knots. I vacillate between thinking up ideas and thinking there is no possible way I could actually pull this off. Thankfully I don't have to worry about pulling anything off yet and have come to the (logical) conclusion that for now all I can do is this mostly small project and pray. Which brings me to those reassurances.
Every time I turn around it seems I am getting answers to those prayers. Not about if this project is going anywhere or if it is wasting time, that would be too easy. But simply that I should be doing it. Joel Osteen's program last Sunday night was (surprise, surprise) about God wanting to bless us and all we need to do is ask. (Yes, we watch Joel every Sunday night, there isn't much else on at that hour and its an amusing and uplifting program. We actually look forward to it each week.) In his homily this morning, Father commented on the sacrifice involved in being active in our lives as Christians rather than sitting on the sidelines. I'm sure there was much more to it but with squirmy ones in the pew I'm feeling lucky I got anything out of the homily - usually I'm reading to one or the other of the boys ;-) This weekend is also the feasts of St. Monica and St. Augustine - the poster pair for persistent and answered prayer.
This whole post might seems like a meandering bunch of nothing after those random thoughts. But if you've made i this far and you're not one of the three people who know my top secret project congratulations for making it through this and there is a point. The answers to my prayers are a combination of "let go and let God" and the old joke that you have to buy a ticket to win the lotto. And that if this mystery project does come through that it isn't about me but about the Spirit moving and all that jazziness. So I am attempting to worry about tomorrow tomorrow and just enjoy the challenge of this project. And I'm trying to remember that while success would mean an even bigger challenge, like the ginormous gargantuan kind, that there is plenty of help available both in people and in intercession.
I have the strength for everything through Him who empowers me.